Sunday, August 05, 2007

Read Me In Berlin

"I am in Europe right now, give me the URL of your blog again."

This is a friend who lives in Beijing. Blogspot is still not accessible there sometime.

I did not think of catching him on always have to ask for it again.

"Where are you"?

"Berlin. "

Sometime, I think, blog makes my friends able to enjoy the company of my feelings or thoughts at time and mood that they most feel like, or when they miss my presence.

And besides my trying to stay inspired, passionate or funny while working like a honey bee, and lonely for still missing someone, besides me trying to write words that mean something, anything, besides my freinds reading these words, enjoying them, hopefully, this online intimacy is pretty drama free and non-obligatory.

I stay silent for months or weeks. I read those blogs I enjoy or about people I miss, without commenting, yet, if they want to know, they know I am there, in their orbit of readers. We are part of each other's life, in a subtle and small way.

I don't track my readership, like some of my freinds track whether their new date is reading their blog. I am not the myspace generation either. I just hope those I care still read my words, as they come into existence, and smile, albeit remain silent.

I like it when my friend is so eager to read about what I write, or about me, as if he is hungry for something. It is a compliment.

For that reason, I forgive him for forgetting the url, just simply ask me again, maybe the latter is better.

Just simply ask me, letting me know that this means something to you, and this can be forgotten when you don't want to read it.

You know they are out there, in this multiple parallel universe of ours, you know silence might not mean distance or empitness. You know keeping someone in your heart is also a good way to love.

"I am the slave of your silence". I once wrote such words to the man I love.

Gradually, I came to know, through living in truth, silence, immensed with thought or longing, could be meaninful and rich.
But for real beauty and content of silence, go to this post of Heaven Tree, now.

So those of you who are out there, read me, some time, while I write, sometime, in our shared silence.
And then we know, we can be close without seeing or touching.


Anonymous shilgia said...

"You know keeping someone in your heart is also a good way to love." -- Do you think so, newyorkred? Because it can hurt and drive one crazy too, as no doubt you know.

11:24 PM  
Blogger NYE said...


I do think keeping someone in heart is a bless. But it does hurt. We woman are creatures of conflict.

Hope to hear your stories sometime, maybe chat someday via a tour to Gawain cafe...

Thanks for breaking the meaningful silence...;-)

9:43 PM  

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